Isaiah was watching a show today and this video came on. He instantly wanted to dance with Mommy (bev) and has been singing and humming the tune all day.
It really is quite cute!
Enjoy!
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HDeh7kzXQrc
Saturday, January 30, 2010
Tuesday, January 19, 2010
ACR
Good evening~
So we had an ACR for Isaiah today, annual case review..that is done every 6 months. Not really annual. HA!
It was me, mom, mom's husband and the DCF worker present. There was a moderator over the phone and we were off. Basically it was a status update of how Isaiah has been doing in placement. It was a tad uncomfortable, but I just kept breathing and drinking my water to get through.
The most interesting thing for me to learn is that Isaiah just might be starting to show his feeling appropriately and to the appropriate people. While we have seen a very affectionate and loving little guy, his mom has been seeing a slightly angry little boy who will not be affectionate to her or embrace her at all during visits. I thought, well, he's mad..and he is finally showing it to her and not us!
Also DCF restated that Isaiah's current plan is now adoption with a back up plan of reunification. This is the opposite of what it was last month. They plan to file termination of parental rights in March, if an agreement is not met by then.
We meet with our lawyer tomorrow to see if we come up with something, but in the end if we have to wait for termination to be filed to get exactly what we think is best for Isaiah, so be it.
I have been listening to the new John Mayer CD and there is a line that I have been singing over and over in my head. It is from the song War of my Life and it is:
And we are, we are prepared. So here we go!
Until then...
ps...if you want to hear the whole JM song, take a listen. LOVE HIM!
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=h8_Y_1psB6g&feature=related
So we had an ACR for Isaiah today, annual case review..that is done every 6 months. Not really annual. HA!
It was me, mom, mom's husband and the DCF worker present. There was a moderator over the phone and we were off. Basically it was a status update of how Isaiah has been doing in placement. It was a tad uncomfortable, but I just kept breathing and drinking my water to get through.
The most interesting thing for me to learn is that Isaiah just might be starting to show his feeling appropriately and to the appropriate people. While we have seen a very affectionate and loving little guy, his mom has been seeing a slightly angry little boy who will not be affectionate to her or embrace her at all during visits. I thought, well, he's mad..and he is finally showing it to her and not us!
Also DCF restated that Isaiah's current plan is now adoption with a back up plan of reunification. This is the opposite of what it was last month. They plan to file termination of parental rights in March, if an agreement is not met by then.
We meet with our lawyer tomorrow to see if we come up with something, but in the end if we have to wait for termination to be filed to get exactly what we think is best for Isaiah, so be it.
I have been listening to the new John Mayer CD and there is a line that I have been singing over and over in my head. It is from the song War of my Life and it is:
Come out Angels
Come out Ghosts
Come out Darkness
Bring everyone you know
I'm not running
I'm not scared
I am waiting and well prepared
And we are, we are prepared. So here we go!
Until then...
ps...if you want to hear the whole JM song, take a listen. LOVE HIM!
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=h8_Y_1psB6g&feature=related
Saturday, January 16, 2010
"Get yourself a lawyer!"
Happy Saturday. We had a nice warm day here today, even spent time outside with Isaiah and exercising!
Well it seems as there has been a lot to update everybody on over the past couple of weeks. And here is yet another update. We found out this past Monday that Isaiah's biological Mom is seriously considering consenting to terminate her rights. This would be a fast end to all of this if it actually happens. His DCF worker called Monday and told us to contact a lawyer to develop an open adoption agreement. So we have an appointment on Wednesday morning with a lawyer who does this type of work and we will see what happens. Kinda nutty.
Also on Tuesday I will attend a case review at DCF for Isaiah's case. It is likely that his Mom will be there so it will be a good time to see how she is really feeling about this. We are very surprised by this development but it is clear that mom is aware that the case is not moving in her direction and that her son is doing very well here. BUT, she could change her mind again...so we just wait and see.
Until then...
Well it seems as there has been a lot to update everybody on over the past couple of weeks. And here is yet another update. We found out this past Monday that Isaiah's biological Mom is seriously considering consenting to terminate her rights. This would be a fast end to all of this if it actually happens. His DCF worker called Monday and told us to contact a lawyer to develop an open adoption agreement. So we have an appointment on Wednesday morning with a lawyer who does this type of work and we will see what happens. Kinda nutty.
Also on Tuesday I will attend a case review at DCF for Isaiah's case. It is likely that his Mom will be there so it will be a good time to see how she is really feeling about this. We are very surprised by this development but it is clear that mom is aware that the case is not moving in her direction and that her son is doing very well here. BUT, she could change her mind again...so we just wait and see.
Until then...
Saturday, January 9, 2010
Friday, January 8, 2010
"Me love you oh much!"
Look at this another post within a week. Nice!
Isaiah has been having a very good week so far. He has been really happy! We have noticed that since we have had him start calling us Mommy and Daddy, he is sooo happy! Perhaps he needed that.
He has started going to bed with less issue this week and not requiring us to count, which is awesome. We used to have to stay up in his bedroom for like 10 minutes in the dark and count to 10 over and over to lull him to sleep. Now he climbs in bed and chooses a story over counting and then lulls himself by watching a fishy lamp my mother gave him for Christmas. ahhhh that Barbie!
Tonight we are dropping him off at a local community center for Respite Nite!!! An agency that collaborates with DCF hosts one every 6 months or so and you can drop the child off for an evening of fun and organized activities. SWEET! I think I was the FIRST one to RSVP, as soon as we got notification in the mail. So Gabe and I will bring him there, go out to dinner and go buy a new camera. So exciting!
The title of this post is something we have been hearing from Isaiah a lot this week. He loves us so much. He doesn't do the 's' sound too well yet! He's getting there...all around.
Tomorrow we are heading to a small children's museum with my cousin and his son for some kid fun. Should be a blast. We'll be sure to snap some photos on the new camera.
Until then....
Isaiah has been having a very good week so far. He has been really happy! We have noticed that since we have had him start calling us Mommy and Daddy, he is sooo happy! Perhaps he needed that.
He has started going to bed with less issue this week and not requiring us to count, which is awesome. We used to have to stay up in his bedroom for like 10 minutes in the dark and count to 10 over and over to lull him to sleep. Now he climbs in bed and chooses a story over counting and then lulls himself by watching a fishy lamp my mother gave him for Christmas. ahhhh that Barbie!
Tonight we are dropping him off at a local community center for Respite Nite!!! An agency that collaborates with DCF hosts one every 6 months or so and you can drop the child off for an evening of fun and organized activities. SWEET! I think I was the FIRST one to RSVP, as soon as we got notification in the mail. So Gabe and I will bring him there, go out to dinner and go buy a new camera. So exciting!
The title of this post is something we have been hearing from Isaiah a lot this week. He loves us so much. He doesn't do the 's' sound too well yet! He's getting there...all around.
Tomorrow we are heading to a small children's museum with my cousin and his son for some kid fun. Should be a blast. We'll be sure to snap some photos on the new camera.
Until then....
Saturday, January 2, 2010
Case Status Update
Happy New Year!
We hope that you all had a wonderful holiday season and are settling in for a happy and healthy new year. We had a nice season, but it was different with a child. We are still adjusting over here a bit!
I wanted to write and give a case status update...since a lot and nothing has gone on since my last real update.
Isaiah is doing very well in our home. He is learning so much at school and his speech continues to develop. He LOVES to watch Max and Ruby and I swear that is where he is learning words like 'delicious' and 'beautiful'. He uses those in his vocab now. Pretty nice! I am totally responsible, however, for teaching him "peace out" which he uses anytime we leave somewhere. I giggle each time he says it...and pray he doesn't say it to his teacher!
He is starting to develop quite a little personality. He loves John Mayer and has 2 favorite songs on the new CD which he tries desperately to sing in the car with me. Again, I giggle! But he is really coming into his own.
He got a ton of wonderful gifts for Christmas and loves all of them. He plays for hours in his play room. He has gotten very comfortable here and seems to be loving living here...except for the days when he doesn't and says he wants to leave. Totally appropriate from what we hear!
So onto the DCF case and the status of him living here. We have been on quite a roller coaster ride with DCF over the past month or so. It had gotten incredibly frustrating and we actually had to sit down and decided if we were going to continue in this process. Not so much because of Isaiah, although he had been exhibiting some particularly aggressive behaviors, but more because of the lack of control and input we have with DCF. It has become incredibly clear that DCF is the guardian, Mom is the mom, with rights...and we are just raising him. There were days we both felt so infuriated about it. It came to a head over the holiday...great timing and Gabe and I sat back, didn't talk to DCF or anyone involved with the case for about a week to cool off and basically develop a plan of what we needed to make this work.
After the holiday we spoke with our Transition worker and she talked with DCF. And just as it has always been in this process, right when we have had it and are ready to pack it in, there was a shift in our direction.
We learned last week that the case for termination of parental rights has grown so strong that DCF is going to file for termination in March, 3 months earlier than originally intended. We couldn't believe it! It meant 3 less months of these feelings and that the process would move along much quicker because basically, when termination is filed, we start gaining some power and control of what happens next. And it is only 3 short months away!
So here is what happens until and after that. Isaiah will continue to have weekly visits with his mom unless it becomes inappropriate. Once termination is filed the case can go one of 2 ways:
1: we can offer some type of long term contact to mom in the form of an open adoption. This contact can be as little as setting up a PO box to send and receive pictures and letters from her or 2 visits a year to weekly visits. We would make the open adoption offer contingent on mom voluntarily relinquishing her parental rights and then the case would not have to go to trial, saving us all a lot of time.
2: we can offer a closed adoption, the case goes to trial and whatever happens happens.
If we offer mom contact in an open adoption and she refuses it and takes the case to trial and loses (which we are told she will), she would then get no option for contact with Isaiah. So really it is in her best interest to relinquish rights, have some contact and not go to trial. BUT we will see what happens. We know we will pursue an open adoption but with very limited contact.
In the past couple of weeks Isaiah has started calling us Mommy Bev and Daddy Gabe. We pushed this transition and are now moving to just mommy and daddy. Since doing so, he has really be super lovey and affectionate. Kisses abundant.
I think that is the entire update as of now. Like I said...a lot...and nothing. We are still in the same position, but it seems like things are moving in our direction. Let's certainly hope so!
It is snowing here again in CT...we have gotten something like 30 inches of snow just in the past week and a half here. So we are going to put Isaiah's sled together and take a stroll around the neighborhood. Pictures to follow....I promise before the next new year.
Until then...
We hope that you all had a wonderful holiday season and are settling in for a happy and healthy new year. We had a nice season, but it was different with a child. We are still adjusting over here a bit!
I wanted to write and give a case status update...since a lot and nothing has gone on since my last real update.
Isaiah is doing very well in our home. He is learning so much at school and his speech continues to develop. He LOVES to watch Max and Ruby and I swear that is where he is learning words like 'delicious' and 'beautiful'. He uses those in his vocab now. Pretty nice! I am totally responsible, however, for teaching him "peace out" which he uses anytime we leave somewhere. I giggle each time he says it...and pray he doesn't say it to his teacher!
He is starting to develop quite a little personality. He loves John Mayer and has 2 favorite songs on the new CD which he tries desperately to sing in the car with me. Again, I giggle! But he is really coming into his own.
He got a ton of wonderful gifts for Christmas and loves all of them. He plays for hours in his play room. He has gotten very comfortable here and seems to be loving living here...except for the days when he doesn't and says he wants to leave. Totally appropriate from what we hear!
So onto the DCF case and the status of him living here. We have been on quite a roller coaster ride with DCF over the past month or so. It had gotten incredibly frustrating and we actually had to sit down and decided if we were going to continue in this process. Not so much because of Isaiah, although he had been exhibiting some particularly aggressive behaviors, but more because of the lack of control and input we have with DCF. It has become incredibly clear that DCF is the guardian, Mom is the mom, with rights...and we are just raising him. There were days we both felt so infuriated about it. It came to a head over the holiday...great timing and Gabe and I sat back, didn't talk to DCF or anyone involved with the case for about a week to cool off and basically develop a plan of what we needed to make this work.
After the holiday we spoke with our Transition worker and she talked with DCF. And just as it has always been in this process, right when we have had it and are ready to pack it in, there was a shift in our direction.
We learned last week that the case for termination of parental rights has grown so strong that DCF is going to file for termination in March, 3 months earlier than originally intended. We couldn't believe it! It meant 3 less months of these feelings and that the process would move along much quicker because basically, when termination is filed, we start gaining some power and control of what happens next. And it is only 3 short months away!
So here is what happens until and after that. Isaiah will continue to have weekly visits with his mom unless it becomes inappropriate. Once termination is filed the case can go one of 2 ways:
1: we can offer some type of long term contact to mom in the form of an open adoption. This contact can be as little as setting up a PO box to send and receive pictures and letters from her or 2 visits a year to weekly visits. We would make the open adoption offer contingent on mom voluntarily relinquishing her parental rights and then the case would not have to go to trial, saving us all a lot of time.
2: we can offer a closed adoption, the case goes to trial and whatever happens happens.
If we offer mom contact in an open adoption and she refuses it and takes the case to trial and loses (which we are told she will), she would then get no option for contact with Isaiah. So really it is in her best interest to relinquish rights, have some contact and not go to trial. BUT we will see what happens. We know we will pursue an open adoption but with very limited contact.
In the past couple of weeks Isaiah has started calling us Mommy Bev and Daddy Gabe. We pushed this transition and are now moving to just mommy and daddy. Since doing so, he has really be super lovey and affectionate. Kisses abundant.
I think that is the entire update as of now. Like I said...a lot...and nothing. We are still in the same position, but it seems like things are moving in our direction. Let's certainly hope so!
It is snowing here again in CT...we have gotten something like 30 inches of snow just in the past week and a half here. So we are going to put Isaiah's sled together and take a stroll around the neighborhood. Pictures to follow....I promise before the next new year.
Until then...
Christmas!
This was our first Christmas with a 3 year old...and we really didn't know what to expect. Christmas Eve we went up to our relatives house about 45 minutes away and there were 3 other 3 year olds there. It was kid heaven! Isaiah played with the other kids and we had a birthday cake for my Grandpa. this is the kids helping get the candles set.
Christmas morning we woke up and Isaiah kept asking if Santa came. He was honestly confused. He is still trying to figure all of this out. Here is a video of part of our morning.
Christmas morning we woke up and Isaiah kept asking if Santa came. He was honestly confused. He is still trying to figure all of this out. Here is a video of part of our morning.
Teeth cleaning!
Isaiah did great at the dentist recently...and then told us he would like to be Elton John for Halloween next year!
Instrument party
We hosted a musical instrument party on December with friends and their kids. not sure what we were thinking, but there were instruments, music and a disco ball. Isaiah loves the drums!
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